Sunday, March 17, 2013

Personal Victory

I started my journey to health a little over a year ago. At the time, I was barely squeezing into my size 18/XL clothing and needed to make a decision~go up to size 20 or get control. A series of events led to me starting to gain control of my body. My biggest personal victory so far happened today. I received a gift certificate to a local consignment shop a few months ago and finally found time to go check it out today. I ended up purchasing two tops and a pair of pants. Two size SMALL tops and a size EIGHT pair of pants. And they all fit perfectly, no squeezing into them. Honestly, I walked out of the shop and cried a little in the car. I still find myself not believing that something that small will fit me. I find myself looking at XL and XXL clothing and reminding myself that what I'm looking at would be way too big. When I was 200+ pounds, shopping was something I avoided at all costs. I loved buying jewelry and other accessories because it didn't matter what size I was to buy them. Clothing though-killed me. I'd leave the dressing room, usually empty handed, wanting to cry. Nothing looked good, and it was simply depressing. I started to not care about how I looked at all. Acne? Who cares. Frizzy hair? Whatever. It's a very dark place to be, avoiding mirrors and hoping to not run into someone that I knew years ago, before I gained weight. I haven't been to any high school reunions. I didn't want to face that or see people whispering. Shopping has become fun again~and a little amazing as I often have to go get smaller sizes because I didn't think I would fit into them when looking at the rack. 

A size eight. I still can't believe it!

1 comment:

  1. I'm so proud of you! Now I can give you the trendy things I try that don't fit me any more! Love you!